Life can be so stressful, but also a blessing

So I've noticed that I am getting really bad at not writing on my blog for certain amounts of time. So much has happened since October (my engagement). First of all, Cameron and I have moved our wedding date twice! It's really frustrating when things don't work out and you have to find all the possibilities that will work. We first set our date for March 14th, which was a perfect time because our spring break would be the week following our wedding. Unfortunately, I don't have a job and am still looking for a job, and it poses problems with financial means. Cameron has been working himself to death trying to earn enough money for us to live when we get married, but unfortunately it's not enough. We figured out that we couldn't have our wedding on the 14th because we are not financially ready. So we looked at the calendar and through our schedules to see when would be a good time to get married. We had considered May 2nd. I was excited because we had "supposedly" set a date. Then I came to figure out that my sister wouldn't have been able to be at my wedding because she has a saturday class at UNM, and the DJ that I wanted has two weddings that day. I was upset because he is one of my favorite people, so again Cameron and I had to move our wedding date. We have had the most frustrating time trying to figure out which day would work, mainly because of school, when finals are, and graduation of my brother and his sister. He is going to do pest control this summer and the training for it is the week of the 18th. We started to think of the 23rd of May. At first it seemed like a good idea, but then Cameron told me that he had training that week and that Saturday. Then we figured out that it is also memorial day weekend. So for the longest time I have been upset and worried that we would have to postpone our wedding again. Cameron talked to the manager of pest control and he has been given permission to take three days off(one for my endownments, one for setting up, and the last for our wedding). So I was relieved and now we have decided that we want to get married May 23rd. Yay!!!! So with that set we can now start planning a little more.
Before I go on, I want to share how my holidays went. I lost my dear grandpa the day before Christmas Eve. My grandpa had not been doing very well and we knew he would be leaving us soon so Monday the 22nd of December, we went to Silver City to say goodbye to my grandpa. My grandma had told us that he was waiting for something. We arrived in Silver City and went straight to my grandpa's room. He looked so skinny and immediately emotion washed over me. My grandpa couldn't talk and he had no strength left in him but I knew he was there, I knew he knew I was there. That day I just sat in his room for most of the time holding his hand and telling him that I loved him very much. The day after we were going to leave so we got everyone together to pray with him and give him a blessing. Not everyone in our family was there, it was my uncle Lloyd, his girlfriend Reggie, my aunt Renee, her husband Jonny and her son Elijah, my mom, brothers, my sister and I. We all gathered around his bed and held hands and put one hand on him. My brother who was filled with emotion gave him a blessing, a wonderful blessing telling him that it was time for him to go home and that everything would be alright, that we would take care of our grandma and make sure she is never alone. After the blessing we each took turns telling him how much we loved him and how grateful we were for the wonderful experiences he gave us while growing up. We said our goodbyes and left for home. That night he passed away, but we knew he was home and in a better place. We went through Christmas with heavy hearts. It was definitely not the best holiday I have ever had but it was also a blessing that my grandpa was in a better place, with no suffering. His funeral was amazing and my mom, my sisters and I had the opportunity to sing for him. It was hard and I didn't think I would be able to get through it but I knew he was there helping us every step of the way. We sang a song my mother wrote called, "There's a Very Special Place, I'm going to someday." It was beautiful and I knew the spirit was with us that day. The thing that helped me the most is that my fiance was able to come and be there to support me and comfort me even though he never had the chance of meeting my grandpa. I was very appreciative and grateful to have had him there. To this day I still miss him but I feel him watching over me all the time.
School started on Tuesday, January 20th. So far it has been going well and I love all the classes I am in. This is my last semester at UNM, so I am finishing my core classes, then I am going to transfer to New Mexico Highlands to get my degree in Elementary Education. I can't wait till I'm done though, it feels like I have been in school for forever. Cameron is planning to be an optomologist so once I am done with school he is going to go to optomologist school in Forest Grove, Oregon. So as planning has been going for our wedding, school going, and me trying to find a job, our lives have been very stressful and busy! I have been praying and praying that everything will work out and that I will find a job that will benefit Cameron and I as we soon start our new life together. I know that married life will be wonderful and amazing and can't wait to step in those temple doors and through the cestial room to be sealed to my fiance for time and all eternity! On that happy note I will say goodbye! Until next time, God Bless!